Have you ever looked for something that you know you left in a specific spot and yet… it is not there. This has been happening a lot lately. I take comfort in the fact that I’ve seen my friends doing it too. Or, that it is happening to them, too. This past weekend, knowing I was getting together with a good friend, I went looking for her birthday present from October and I couldn’t find it. For someone who is an organized person, this is maddening. You look in the usual place(s), but it is not there. So, a little put out, you look in other places. Nothing. Now, I’m seriously looking under the couch, in the outside storage closet, in the hall closet, everywhere – nothing. Out to the car ~ maybe, maybe I left it in the car? Nothing. Even typing this, my fingers pound at a different rhythm because it was so vastly irritating.
Do you know where I found it? In the exact spot I had already checked four or five times and exactly where it was supposed to be. I’m telling you, it was not there before. Suddenly, it’s back, right where it is supposed to be. Sigh. This is why I am an organized person, because I hate wasting time. Truly hate it. We’ve got 1,440 minutes in a day, which separates out into 288 five-minute periods. Why do I know that? Because when I was a lot younger, I waited by the phone for this guy to call and I realized how often he could have called, which, of course, just made me mad. Okay, hurt. But this isn’t the day for true confessions of a lost soul. No, today is for lost things.
When you’re older, you start to wonder if it is early Alzheimer’s kicking in, which is not funny. Especially, if you live alone as I do – you want to stay conscious of things like that so you can deal with ’em. Well, I do. I am fortunate in that, to the best of my knowledge, Alzheimer’s has never occurred in my family history. Nobody lived long enough for it to occur in the natural progression of age. But, I’ve got friends who do have it in their family history and that would make me edgy.
When I started studying spirituality and metaphysics years ago, one of the cautionary tips was: first, life would never be the same again. That has turned out to be true. Second, you will end up teaching what you most wanted to learn. That was also true. Third, the universe will mess with you. Also true. After about 30 years, I have a few tips of my own. First, you cannot beat the universe. Get as mad as you like, threaten to take your ball and bat and go home. Quit, if you like. Won’t make a damn bit of difference. You offered and the Universe accepted. Note the initial cap this time on Universe. You may call that entity God, the Source, whatever. It doesn’t care what you call It. Second, you will spend a great deal of time laying on cool linoleum or on your bedroom floor in an attempt to de-stress. De-compress. Shake it off. This will help, by the way. Knocking your head against carpet is a softer landing than linoleum – trust me on that one. Drumming your heels and pounding your fists sounds a lot better on linoleum, though.
There was that time a friend from out of town came to visit. She had had a particularly bad day and I recommended she take a hot bath. There are times when I’m a good hostess, this was one of them. I went to draw her a bath. Couldn’t find the bath plug. Now, there is only one place for a bathtub plug. That is, right by the bathtub. Oh, come on, I live alone, nobody walks off with my bathtub plug, right? Right? Nowhere to be found. I called my friend to come into the bathroom and look for it – maybe I just wasn’t seeing it. Nothing. We gave up on the bath idea and I poured her a glass of wine instead. Good hostess. Two days later, we were walking out to the car and my friend says, “Oh, I see you found the bathtub plug.” No, I hadn’t …. it just showed up, right where it was supposed to be. What do you do with that? The Universe borrowed it? Come on, you can be spiritual without being stupid. Nonetheless, I have to admit, the Universe does borrow things. And, for the record, I am not stupid.