>An interesting challenge:
If you could read a book containing all that has happened and will ever happen in your life, would you? If you choose to read it, you must read it cover to cover.
Straight up answer: No. No, I would not. “But why?,” you ask. “Don’t you want to know?” Yes, I do, after all is said and done. This goes to a belief of mine that I hold strongly to. Namely, that I have the God-given right to free will and not even God transcends his own gifts.
I am surprised at how fired up this question got me. Not even a lousy cold will hold me back, nor comments closed. In the study of metaphysics, there is a library that contains the books of our life or lives, depending on your belief system. Ideally, when you are questioning your path, you can access your book. There is also the belief that God has a great Plan for each and every one of us and some hold that it is already written what we have done, what our choices were, right down to what comments you make, what actions you take. We are just showing up for the replay. Some people are very comforted by that. I am not. I am repulsed by it.
I believe I am an active participant in my life, it is by my choices, by my actions that I contribute to this world, this time, and I am most passionate about that. I do believe we each have a purpose to our lives and that God created us for that purpose. Seeking that purpose and acting upon it is what separates us from all other life forms on this planet, insofar as we know. It is the seeking and then acting that makes us individuals and unique amongst ourselves. Mind, I’m all for creative understanding. If I had one motto to sum up my life, it would be “She always wanted to know why.”
Having said that, I’ll tell you about a meditation I had that gave me great comfort in dealing with the trials and tribulations of this life, if not the weirdness of it. I had gotten into a very bad disagreement with Heather, a fellow co-worker, who accused me of doing her job instead of my own and she threw a whole lot of insults into that argument and was over the top in her anger. She was going to be one of my annual reviewers and, clearly, she was going to write a bad review.
In this meditation, I saw a room, similar to a classroom. There was a chalkboard and figures lounged against, leaned on or sat on top of tables. There was a meeting going on, a group of souls gathered together – this was a group that would travel together and spend time on Earth for the growth of their Souls. My Soul was at the head of the classroom, speaking and pointing at the chalkboard where there was a horizontal line with groves marked vertically. When my Soul would tap a vertical line, it would show an event. Sounds like the book, doesn’t it? Where I could just listen in and find out everything. Then I heard what my Soul was saying, “Okay, right at about this point, I need a volunteer bad guy, an asshole, to push her out of that job and into another.” There was grumbling within the family of souls: “I don’t want to be the bad guy. What does it always have to be a bad guy?” My Soul looked them over coolly. “Because she is stubborn and when she gets comfortable, it is very hard to get her to shift. She needs to shift at this point in order to have future possibilities and trajectories, which she won’t have if she stays there.” Long pause. A hand finally, reluctantly, rose and I focused on the Soul. It looked just like Heather. “Oh, alright, I’ll do it. But I don’t like it.”
See the difference? It would still be my choice, but a little incentive had been added to the equation. When I looked at Heather in real time, I had the glimmer that maybe she had volunteered to be the asshole and that maybe – actually, ahem, no doubt about it, I had needed to be insulted enough by this little creep that I would declare that I would never again be at the mercy of some reviewer who was petty enough to take it out on me. Because of Heather, I enrolled in real estate, got my license in six weeks, a loan to tide me over for six months, and left that law office. And, here’s the thing. Sometime in the next year, Heather called to ask me to coffee and apologized. Hmm…. Because of those decisions, I was in the right place at the right time to meet the man who would become my husband, my Soul Mate, and — oh, wait, that’s for another story.